Swisayd survivors...

Here's the last support group attendance req't of one of my classes.

I went to this SURVIVORS of SUICIDE meeting...

I know what you're thinking!!! MALI!

It's not about those who attempted it, but those loved ones left behind. Wag nyo ko tanungin what's my stand on it, coz isang mahabang debate ito with myself. IT's a dilemma na until now, I haven't figured out yet. But yesterday, it was not about me... it was about them... their experiences with grieving, their experiences with their battle of depression, loss, and anger.

I'm sure mahirap mawalan ng love ones. If it's swisayd, who are you to blame? yourself? the society? their frends? booze? or the love one you lost? Lots of questions left unanswered. And I know exactly how that feels, yung each night you mind will be plagued by questions... but kahit how many times you sleep-getup-sleep-getup... it will never have answers... NEVER.

It was so sad. I caught a tear or two every once in a while, pero sobrang pinipigil ko umiyak. I understand them, but I understand the pipol who died more. There may be ways to solve a problem, but not for them. They may be happy, smiling and able to do everyday responsibilities, but deep inside, it's a slow burning candle. You'll never know how many hours, days, months or even years pa ang itatagal before their wick runs out. I could have talked, as a person who have entertained for several times the thought of doing it. I talked.. to myself.

And everytime I nod my head, I agree. I agree that what they felt was horrible intense pain. Masakit. Masakit kaya their only way out is to die. To fulfill that dream of peace. It's not stupidity for most pipol, they have reasons. Just like us... we have reasons to live... reasons to endure the pain... for some, reasons are gone.

Those who have died commiting suicide, killed themselves not to punish their love ones, not to intentionally hurt them, but to end the pain... it came to a point that it is too much to handle. And this is what I believe in.

So if we ever u want to prevent suicide: Give the people you love reasons to live. REASONS. REASONS ans reasons before they hit the wall and just goes blank... Don't let them reach a point where evrything you say, will never be heard anymore...
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I understand that not all suicide are based experiences, some are side effects of medication and some are for unknown reasons... this is just me talking... ME.